Patella Expands - 12/06/2007

This weekend, David is sitting in the loft, playing Call of Duty 4 on-line. It's late and I am laying on the couch in the loft. I could go to bed, the bedroom door is 5 feet away. But I don't see David much except on the weekends, so I feel bad going to bed (he's a night owl). I compromise and lay on the upstairs couch with a blanket and pillow.

David's got his head set on and is talking to the guys on-line that he is playing with. I slip in and out of consciousness. Then I hear:

"Damn it. Negroes killed me!"

Huh??

I pop open an eye. I look at him and say "Honey?!? Why the heck are you saying 'Negroes' on-line?"

David stops, stares, and then starts laughing, hard. "I just got it!," he exclaims. He says it again to me: "Negroes." and then he spells it out: K. N. E. E. G. R. O. W. S. Knee Grows. One of the guys he is playing with has the screen name of Knee Grows.

And it took David a couple of hours to figure it out.

David's screen name? Lard Tub.

Faith, Hope & Trick - 10/03/2007

Last Friday evening, I set a completely-full load of dishes to wash in the dishwasher. About 5 minutes later, Jacob comes down and says "What's burning?"

The dishwasher wasn't washing. Water was barely trickling out of it and the washer thingy that spins wasn't spinning. Great. The smell was the burners inside that make the water super hot heating up. A dishwasher full of crusty, grimey dishes. FULL. It was late Friday night and I was NOT cleaning dishes at 10 p.m. on Friday night.

Saturday morning, after breakfast which David missed because he was still sleeping, I called Jacob over. I filled the sink with hot soapy water and proceeded to wash and wash and wash and wash, while Jake dried and put away. Our dish drainer was way too small to hold an entire dishwasher full o' grossness. *sigh* He's a good kid, that Jake. It took us a good half hour to 45 minutes to get them washed, dried and put away.

We've been washing dishes by hand since Saturday, which is not a bad thing. I'm used to it. Up until "Blue House" I always washed dishes by hand. Why bother putting dishes in a dishwasher for just me & Jake, right? David hates hand-washing dishes and so does a horrid job of it. Horrid!

Tonight, I'm washing yet another cup and I'm thinking, I hate Volusia County's Tax Assessor. Remember when you were a kid or a teen and you'd hear the "old folks" (i.e. your parents who were only like in their 30's and were totally NOT old) talk about property taxes and boy-howdy I am voting Joe Candidate because he said he'd lower taxes? Yea, me neither. I was too busy teasing my bangs to new heights and bumming rides to the BK Lounge to care. Now I know what they were all talking about. These stupid property taxes make your mortgage go up if you have an escrow account. These taxes that just made our mortgage go up another $300 a month, AND depleted our savings by another $800 with a one-time bill to get us caught up on the deficit in our mortgage.Yea, hate property taxes and Volusia county, methinks, as I wash another cup, because there is no way in HADES we can afford to fix the dishwasher, which by the way, is out of warranty as of June.

I sigh. I decide to give it (the dishwasher) another try because I am a glutton for punishment and enjoy mentally beating tax assessors with frying pans that I just happen to be washing. I flip the switch and wait for the nothingness that is a whining motor. WHOOOSH! Water is spraying, the spinning thingy is spinning. What? I open it up quickly. Water is everywhere inside. I give a cheer, close it back up to run the load empty to clean out the gunk that was there from last week, thank God aloud and make a mental note to make sure I vote for the other guy.

Objects in Space - 08/09/2007

I have a MySpace page; yes I do. It started as a means to look at 3 of my sister's pages. They'd say "look at the blady-blah I posted," and when I would go look, it would tell me I needed to be my sister's "friend" to see their page. But...I am their sister!!! I signed up. My page is completely Buffied, as I am a geek.

Jake also has a page, mainly full of anime stuff. I monitor his page all the time. He won't post anything I would find objectionable, because he knows me.

I am his parent. I am not here to be his best friend. I am a parent. My job is to love him, nurture him, feed his body, mind & soul, house him, lead him by example and hope he takes to my instruction and grows to be a good man who will be honest, a hard worker and will treat his future girlfriends and wife with dignity & respect. I am not here to be his best friend. I won't be like a male parent I know, who told me that he would rather his teen boys drink alcohol in his home where he can monitor them. What? Uh, NO! I am a PARENT. I am not Lindsey Lohan's mom. He respects me, he loves me, he thinks I am old and a dork. He's not wrong.

I was reading and looking at his friends' pages. He leaves his page logged on and up on the screen on our computer. He has nothing to hide and I am proud of him. Some of the things I see, though, lead me to believe that some parents have no idea what is going with their kids' MySpace pages. Junior High girls posting pictures of themselves in their underwear? I doubt their mom knows about that. 13 & 14 year old girls who set their smiley icon mood to "Horny." Bet mom doesn't know about that one either.

I spoke frankly to Jake about all of it. (He rolled his eyes.) "It's just MySpace, it doesn't mean anything." I told him I hoped he made choices that would not make him be a follower or a victim of peer pressure. Am I old fashioned? In this day & age, maybe so. Do I care that I am old-fashioned? Not one iota. As a parent, do you?

Cell-Schmell 07/15/2007

I have a Love-Hate relationship with cell phones. I enjoy their portability. I like that we really don't need a home phone any longer. I like that you can "take" your number with you if you switch carriers. I especially like cell phone carriers vying for my business by giving me great offers.

My dislikes are as follows:

• People who drive 40 in a 55 zone because they are not paying attention. They have their arm up to their ear and are jabbering at 55 mph. Too bad their foot can't keep up with their mouth. And why don't they have a Blue Tooth or even a cord from their phone to their ear? Why are they doing the one-handed drive?

• Being called while I am driving is also another dislike, especially when the caller knows I am driving. Don't call to say "Whatcha doing?" I'm baking a cake. I'M DRIVING!! At least I have an ear piece in use and both hands on the wheel.

• People who leave them on in movie theaters, libraries, restaurants, etc.

• Getting calls for "Gilberto Gonzalez" for two and a half years. The fact that two and a half years have gone by and I am still getting his calls is upsetting. Even worse, half of Gilberto's calls are from Sprint, his "wireless service provider." (Automated Machine Mangling His Name:) "Gelburto GONzalez, please hold for an important announcement from your cell phone carrier, Sprint". Dear Sprint: You are stupid. How do you not even know that this cell phone number is no longer Gilberto's? How do you not know that you don't even own this number, as I use T-Mobile? I have told them at least 4 times to stop calling. It has not worked.

Yea, so. Love them and hate them.

Lessons - 10/06/2006

If the current fiasco involving Republican Senator (senator, right?) Foley has not taught you anything, you need to go back to school. We live in a society now where anything we say, or more importantly anything we type, can come back and bite you in your nethers. If you think no one is reading, you are a fool. You think these e-mails and IM's go away once you hit delete? Please. That little bit of information is not only saved on the recipient's e-mail address, but your computer, and the server of the e-mail provider you are using. Let's also not forget that ever-popular "forward" button. Lord forbid you work for a company with an IT department. They ARE reading your e-mail and probably have some e-mail policy saying they can do so. Pay attention class: if it's something you do not want to get out, something private and personal...pick up a phone. Or better yet, talk to the person face to face. Information is everywhere. You can't stop the signal.

"Lessons," Buffy Season 7, Episode 1

Some Assembly Required - 07/05/2006

Mom, I am sorry. I really am. But I have to Blog this. It's a matter of civic duty (and also, you don't have a computer, I am evil, and will be punished).

So...mom calls and asks for some help for her husband Jose. Seems that my mom's husband Jose received a mailing at his daughter's house. He's a FINALIST in a SWEEPSTAKES. The drawing will be soon! In the meantime, in between time, he's been awarded a voucher for $400 off a $698 laptop. He mails the $298 check and receives a post card stating that the merchandise would be mailed in 14 days. Well, it's been over a month and they have not seen anything. *bells ringing* *scam* *scam* She gives me the account number, the phone number and the name of the company: Sweepstakes Clearinghouse. *dingdingding* I asked mom if she was serious. I said that this sounded like a scam. She asked what that word meant in Spanish. I explained it to her, and told her I would call her back.

The phone number with a Dallas exchange put me through to the computer, that politely mentioned the merchandise was mailed May 9th...almost 2 months ago. When I tried to connect to customer service, I was told to call back during business hours. What business hours, you ask? I don't know - I got hung up on after that message.

I decided to Google Sweepstakes Clearinghouse. Go on, get ye to Google. Find the many, many web sites about the complaints filed my various people and ..oh yes, the entire state of Iowa. When an entire state files a lawsuit, you know something's fishy.

I called mom back & told her the bad news. I told her I would follow up during "business hours" and see what they said, but to be aware that they are possibly out of $300. Well, not they. He. It's all his money, she gets a $20 weekly allowance, but I'm not bitter.

There are complaints about sending $44 for a tv, and getting one with a 5" monitor! Five Inches! Others tried getting a stereo or computer, and ended up paying extra c.o.d. charges up to $50. The computer is so old & so bad, it is not even funny. This website below shows a copy of the flyer for the computer....a dinosaur with 128 MB of memory. Woo.
Click Here for one such website - scroll down a bit when you get to the page.
I know older people get scammed and it disgusts me. My mom's husband, though, knows better. He should know better. It just blows my mind. You can't get something for nothing. Buyer, PLEASE beware. Some Assembly Required...mainly to your checking account.

Never Kill a Boy on the First Date - 05/24/2006

I was talking yesterday with my brother-in-law, David's youngest brother, about how David and I met. When I told him, he thought I was kidding. So did David's mom, for that matter. So, it's share-time.

Back in 1998-1999, cell phones did not have the great plans they have now. Free nights, weekends, free calls between network people, etc. Also, I didn't have a cell phone. :) I talked to my sister Vicky practically every day, but the long-distance bills were rough. We got AOL and talked all the time via IM instead. We would be up till 2 a.m. addicted to AOL. Vicky had an ad with AOL's dating service. It used to be called Love at AOL (now, it's actually merged with Match.com). She would send me links of all the scary guys who would answer her ad (she got TONS of replies) and I would laugh with her, . She started sending me links to guys in Orlando - scary guys. We'd laugh at them all, because "occasionally, I'm callous and strange". . She sends me a link and writes "This one's cute." I open it and it is a picture of David. She also IM's "Aaaand he's on-line right now. I dare you!" Yup, I did. I sent David an IM. He said he was busy and had to leave and could I send him a picture, since I had already seen his. (he was on his way out on a date, by the way). I sent the picture and thought that was that.

The next day, I get an IM when I am on-line because, again - addicted to AOL. We talked on the phone and via e-mail and eventually set up a date. We met at Applebee's and had dinner. He was goofy, but I have a thing for goofy guys. (side bar - David had a date w/someone else that he cancelled after meeting me - LOL)

Yada yada yada.....MARRIED. OK, not that fast. We dated 3 years before we got married.
And that's our story.