Him - 06/13/2007

Three "Him's" to be exact.

• I'm driving home from work today on a brand new stretch on road. There are two northbound lanes. It is POURING rain. I, knowing how the streets flood here, am in the left lane behind a man who is unfortunately riding a Harley in the pouring rain. On the right, is a Toyota Avalon, whose driver is really not so bright. He or she is speeding in the downpour. Motorcycle Man and I, in the left lane, notice that up ahead, the right lane is completely flooded out and has in fact come over to our lane. He puts his hand down to signal he is slowing down, but no need, as I had started to slow down as well. Toyota Avalon person? Not so much. This Einstein goes barreling through the small lake in front of him/her, and then decides to slam on the brakes....but not before completely drenching motorcycle man. I said "Ooooooooooh. Idiot." aloud as I saw the tsunami hit. Motorcycle guy was not too happy. He stared down Toyota Avalon person. The rest of the 2 mile ride was spent driving really slow, as motorcycle man kept trying to get beside Toyota person to give him a piece of his....finger and boot, actually, but Toyota person kept slowing down to not be next to him. So, we went really slow up to the point where the right lane becomes a "right turn only" lane and Toyota person had to merge with us. Toyota person let me and another truck pass before they merged. Toyota person was probably too afraid of what motorcycle guy would do. I *so* wished I had a nice XXXL t-shirt in my Jeep. I would have jumped out at the light and handed it to him to change. He was drenched, poor Him.


• David calls tonight to say his battery is acting up and he needed to go buy a new one. I told him to check the auto parts store to see if they could just recharge it. He asks me which auto parts store, as there are 2 right next to each other. Here's how this conversation went:

Me: It's the one next to the Indian place that used to be a Pizza Hut.

Him: What?? You want me to go get the battery checked at the Indian place??

Me: Are you MENTAL??

After I hung up the phone, the hilarity of this conversation finally struck me, and I started giggling, then outright laughing to myself. What could he have possibly heard over that cell phone?

• My son Jake placed his nightly call from the road to me. They are at Camp Lejune (Military base) and are having a ball. He got to sit in the cockpit of an Osprey today and toyed with a glass...something. Some kind of navigation system that is all touch screen and fancy. He was all excited. Then he says "Grandpa wants to talk to you." Oh-oh, I say to myself. What has he done? Alex (my ex-father-in-law) proceeds to tell me what a joy Jacob is and to thank me for letting him spend these 2 weeks on the trip with him. Alex has two grandkids with him; Jake and Jake's cousin Maddy. They are about the same age and as different as night and day; and not just because they are male & female. Maddy is outgoing, exuberant; Jake is introspective and thoughtful (as in he ponders & mulls things over before making up his mind). Alex laughed as he explained how Maddy pushes Jake's buttons because he is so serious. He also says that as they were in an Atomic museum, Jake saw a really neat item. Alex asked him if he wanted it. Jake turned the piece over, saw the price and said "No, it's too expensive," and set it down. Maddy walks over, looks at the price and says "I want it," and walks off through the store with it in hand. Alex told Jake "Don't you worry about cost. Only worry about if you want it." So Jake eventually conceded. Alex said "You raised him good, girl." and I was so proud. This is gold coming from him.