Peace Out - 02/13/2007

What a weird day.

1) A friend of a friend died this weekend. I sort-of knew him. Funny thing...I "married" him & his ex-wife - I officiated the ceremony back in 2001 (I can do that you know - perform marriage ceremonies). In late 2001, I officiated "K" and his now ex-wife's wedding. I knew him by association. His daughter had claimed Jacob as her one true love back in kindergarten. His mom lives in the same neighborhood as my friend Julie who originally set me up to perform the ceremony, and his mom is the immediate next door neighbor to that Home Depot/Boy Scout/Cub Scout friend I saw last week. He & the lady I married got divorced, and he started dating another acquaintance of mine - one of my 'dancing buddies', "A." K & A eventually married, moved to my city with his 2 daughters from a previous marriage and her son from a previous marriage.

My friend Julie calls me to say that "A" called her today. "K" was in a motorcycle accident that cost him his life this weekend. Man. I have not thought about them in 2 or 3 years. I feel so bad for "A." Last I saw them, she was so happy with him. *sigh*

2) My in-laws are coming to town for Isabel's party! WOO HOO! Each leg of the trip, $39 ea!! Thirty Nine! How awesome is that? AND they will be flying into the smaller airport that is MUCH closer to our house. I decide to call my mom then to see when exactly they would be flying in from Puerto Rico. My mom & David's parents would be flying in the same day, at different airports. I got a hold of my mom.....only to have her say that she has decided to not come to visit until after Isabel's party. The party I scheduled around her schedule. Why? WHY? Because my dad , my step-mom and several other members of my family on my dad's side will be here too. She must have been talking with one of my sisters, because this was NEVER brought up before. Apparently, WE ARE IN HIGH SCHOOL. Twenty two years after the divorce and she doesn't want to be here when they are?! This is not about that. It is about Isabel and the fact that half my family has never been to one of her parties, nor one of Jake's parties since he was 4 years old. I said to my mom "Mom! We're adults!" She sort-of shushed or negated me and said no, she doesn't want to come if they come.

I was telling some co-workers about this. I told them earlier on that this was my "Forget It" year. This is the year that I will *not* make the effort to appease everyone. I won't be bending over backwards sending birthday cards to others, or family pictures to anyone who never bothers to call me or mine on our birthdays or send us pictures, or even acknowledge they received anything from us. "Forget It." It's my personal pledge. I told David he could do what he wanted, but I feel tired of it all. I feel too much and no longer want to feel so much about the little things. Don't sweat the small stuff, so I won't.

Isabel's party is coming up. The date is not changing, no one is getting uninvited. Sorry that you can't make it. Maybe next decade.

The fact that my mom and others won't come because my dad, step-mom and half-sisters on dad's side, plus a couple of second cousins are coming will not make me change anything about this party. The fact that one half of my family won't be in the same location as the other is sad. Whatever happened in the past, it is not the fault of either of my half-sisters. Why should I ignore them when they did nothing wrong? The (literal and figurative) "sins of the father" do not pass down to the children.

I'm told by my kin that I'm too nice . Imagine that. Too nice. When did being nice become a flaw? It is, you know. It's seen as a weakness; it's archaic. I am weak & archaic. Nice is old-fashioned. When did this become "out?" I need to move to Iowa or something. They have nice people there, right?

"Peace Out," Angel Season 4, episode 21